A life-changing shift

After watching How to Change Your Mind on Netflix, I was convinced that I needed to step off of the SSRI bandwagon and try psilocybin microdosing. I took weeks to carefully and safely come off of my antidepressant meds (that I had been on for most of the pandemic), with my doctor’s support, before I finally took the first step of ordering from SoulCybin. I started small, 25mg at first, and I believe I was seeing results within the first week. I chose the Fadiman Protocol (dosing once every three days, for three weeks, then a week off to reset tolerance). I felt more even-keeled, and the bumps in life that would often send me into dysregulation suddenly seemed less… bumpy. I have CPTSD from some pretty messed-up things that happened to me as a child, as well as what I suspect is undiagnosed ADHD (three of my four children are on the spectrum), but I was “managing” it myself as so many of us were forced to do. But when I hit menopause, it all came crashing down, and the pandemic certainly didn’t help either. All the antidepressant and antianxiety meds made things less chaotic, but also dulled any joy or happiness I might have felt. I was also practicing a lot of other things like vipassana meditation, yoga nidra, and emotional re-regulation practices, but with the SSRIs and Xanax, I just felt so empty and wrung out and tired all the time. Once I cleared those things out of my system and started microdosing, it felt like the colors started to seep back into my black-and-white life. I moved up to 50 and then 100mg dosages (still only a tenth of a psychoactive dose), and have been stable with 100 for the last month. I’m not going to say I’m 100% improved, but I do think that mushrooms have helped me progress on my journey in a much healthier and more positive direction than antidepressants ever did. I know those pharmaceuticals are lifesavers for some people, and they did stop my persistent spiraling into despair; they just couldn’t do much more than that. Psilocybin has helped me turn the lights back on again, brought hope back into my vocabulary, and made me feel like maybe my story isn’t done yet. I am so grateful I learned about them, and that I found a reliable, dependable, trusted source of this medicine in SoulCybin.